When I think about the word “Aura”, I think about all those people who believe that others walk around displaying good or bad “Auras”, you know, like lavender or silver. It`s not that I don`t believe in any of this, I am quite open to all sorts of beliefs and feelings, but I haven`t seen it myself…..yet. I did have a visit from my own “Aura” of a different kind recently though, a very uneasy feeling and sadly no colours around heads. It seems, according to my GP, that I have been experiencing Aura Migraines and they are an absolute bitch to handle to put it mildly. They never seem to time their visits well either!
Like the fear inducing first painful migraine that had me bed ridden, vomiting and having diarrhea soon after childbirth, this too had me panic stricken that I was either going blind or having a brain haemorrhage. It, like the painful type, did pass and only then did I realise what had happened and waited for the next one ☹. I knew there would be one and it was a few weeks later.
This is how my first one happened, completely out of the blue and not good timing at all but if it stops anyone else freaking out it`s worth a go at describing…….
I had just had a morning at a local organic farm I have joined. It was a fabulous morning and we were just finishing up lunch after working. It was a gorgeous sunny day. Now, I do need glasses for reading but felt I couldn`t see the other girls in my group properly as we were leaving, so put them on thinking I had best see the optician next week. But no help at all.
Suddenly, and I will try to describe this moment…I felt like I could only see through a speech bubble through my left eye, everything around it as I walked was a blur. All vision but that small circle went. Stairs were a nightmare to fathom and I felt really unsteady on my feet. Covering my left eye didn`t stop it either and I was about to drive to pick my daughter up. In hindsight had I known it was going to subside I would have waited. But in the moment I wanted to get us home as I didn’t know what was happening. As soon as I saw her I had to ask her about my left eye. She tends to think I`m a drama queen at times but she could see I was in a different state of worry than usual. I was convinced my eye must look odd, I don`t know, red or bulging but she convinced me it looked fine. We sat for about 20 mins and it suddenly went as quickly as it had appeared. The relief was unbelievable. I felt elated. My sight was fine.
On googling when I got back home, I was convinced, if it had been an Aura Migraine, then any images I could look at would be useless as how can anyone know what you are seeing ?? A little like hypnagogic hallucinations that I have, that no one else can see, but only describe. But no! Google images captured, and I have no idea how, what I had experienced spot on! Here is an idea of what it was like….
So, my next mission was to see if these are linked to the perimenopause and bingo! What do you know, they are! Oh joy 😕! Another thing to worry about and dread getting at any time of day. Perhaps I shall keep a log of when they occur? The third paragraph of the article I have attached links the perimenopause and migraines.
It was not so long ago I was grateful the migraines I suffered in my thirties had pretty much stopped, so to have a few of these has p+#@*d me off ! Yes, they are shorter, yes there is no pain or vomiting or days of head fuzz after but they are so disconcerting especially that initial one. Bloody hormones!! Bugger off you’ve caused enough havoc already !!☹